Candy Crush vs. Man Crush

Hello.  My name is Shelby Louise Stockton, and I am an addict. No, I don’t abuse drugs or alcohol…anymore.  The monkey on my back is far more deceiving.

I am a Candy Crush junkie.  Yes, the smartphone game.  I am completely obsessed with organizing candy on a tiny iPhone screen, and it’s ruining my life!  

I dream about Candy Crush.  Just before I fall asleep I think of cool ways to organize confections, and it makes me happy.  THIS is making me happier than acomplishing my goal of meeting John Stamos.  This must end.  This must end TODAY.

Granted, it’s not just Candy Crush that has distracted me from the task at hand.  As my regulars (if you’re still out there) know, since I have started this blog, I have quit teaching, moved to Paris for a stint to cheerlead, and wrote/performed a one woman musical on both coasts about the experience.  I’m ready to hang up the cheerleading uniform for good and get this damn blog over with.

So what am I going to do?

I have written Jonathan a handwritten letter to explain my mission and why he MUST help me accomplish it.

 

I cannot show you the rest of the letter, as it’s private, but I will tell you this: 1) It’s well-written. 2) It’s sincere. 3) I explained that I’m not crazy and refuse to do anything that would get me detained, and this is a social experiment, and I really need him to comply, or I’m a failure at life.  (I didn’t use those words exactly, but he’s mature enough to read between the lines.)

OK you guys, I’m going to send this to Jonathan’s production company and wait patiently for a response.  It just HAS to happen, right?